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1. APARTMENT for RENT‏
(Humor/Humor)
... of the note, the girl immediately returned the check for $250 with the following note:   'Dear Sir: #1 - I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to remain ...
... IN BRAZIL) turned on his TV (MADE IN INDONESIA) and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in AMERICA?    ...
3. An old lady
(Humor/Humor)
... be granted three wishes. "Well, now," says the old lady, "I guess I would like to be really rich." *** POOF *** her rocking chair turns to solid gold. "And, gee, I guess I wouldn't mind being a young, ...
4. Creative Writing
(Humor/Humor)
This assignment was actually turned in by two English students: Rebecca and Gary English 44A SMU, Creative Writing,   Prof Miller In-class Assignment for Wednesday "Today we will experiment with a ...
... himself even after the teacher told him it was nasty.  Two boys were content spraying each other and wouldn't pay attention to their female partners.     When the teacher turned her back many of the kids ...
6. Random
(Humor/Humor)
... do you go to when you have a pain in your hickory     dickory? A: "Rose Bowl."  Q: What do you say when it's Rose's turn at the bowling alley? A: That darn cat.  Q: Who ruined that darn rug? A: High rollers.   ...
... as all the kids called him a dickhead. But with delight would they all scream and yell When Pinocchio's turn came for show and tell. For it didn't take much to get him excited and even Miss Teacher ended ...
... and a plastic rhinoceros.    The scuffle with the Mirror chicken, carrying its head under its wing, came as he returned to Conservative Central Office. The two birds war-danced around Smith Square "pecking ...
9. An elderly woman
(Humor/Humor)
... and they don't smell.  In fact, doctor, I've farted five times since I've been in here."  Well, the doctor gave the old woman some pills and asked her to return in a week.  A week later, the woman returned, ...
... do some hot-wiring in the mattress," suggested the electrician.  "Well,"smiled the dentist, "I'm not going to tell you what I'll do. Just wait and see."  The morning after his return from the honeymoon, ...
11. Old Lamp
(Humor/Humor)
... it and decides, what the heck, lets rub it and see what happens.  Sure enough, a genie appears and immediately  says, "Thank you master for freeing me from the lamp. In return, I offer you three wishes." ...
12. W H A T A M I?
(Humor/Humor)
... of the opening and some from its long  glistening shaft. After everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids have ceased emanating, it is returned to its freely hanging state of rest, ready ...
13. Deep Thoughts
(Humor/Humor)
... asked, except maybe "Don't you think it is about time you audited my return?" or "Isn't is morally wrong to give me a warning when, in fact, I was speeding?" Age15    Once, I wept for I had no shoes.  ...
14. It's Wednesday!
(Humor/Humor)
... no idea you were this religious." The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist!"  ...
15. Lucky Charms
(Humor/Humor)
... are turned on by watching what is being done, but because they                          want to be able to watch themselves having a good time. They                          often moan out their own ...
16. Two Cajuns
(Humor/Humor)
... she sees him get about halfway across the bridge and turn back When he reaches her, she asks, "What happened, I thought you were going to beat up Clarence?"  And Pierre says, "Ya', but that was before ...
17. Lucky
(Humor/Humor)
... sneezes yet again.  He takes his penis out and wipes the tip off.  The woman has finally had enough.  She turns to the man and says, "Three times you've sneezed, and three times you've removed your penis ...
18. The Computer Hillbillies
(Humor/Humor)
...    Months turned to years and his hair was turning grey.  Jed worked very hard while his life slipped away.  Waiting to retire when he turned 64,  Instead he got a call and escorted out the door.    Laid ...
... he used and in turn huddled around him.   6. Crickets hear through their knees. 7. Mr. Rogers is an ordained minister. 8. The gene for the Siamese coloration in animals such as cats, rats or rabbits is ...
20. Little Johnny
(Humor/Humor)
... This he did. The following morning, Johnny described everything to his mother. 'Sis and her boyfriend sat and talked for a while, then he turned off most of the lights. Then he started kissing and hugging ...
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